World Class Menagerie

     Spent the day at the zoo with the family. Was quite fun, save for the sun beating down and no cloud cover whatsoever. Overall was a good day though, usually is when we get away from the house. And here is where I show off the awesome pics I took (yes, someone left me alone with camera xD ).

 Yes, mum really is that short (I may be short, but she's even shorter ^^) . The polar bear is almost but not quite two of her stacked tall.

 The Rose Garden at our zoo is amazing, so I had to get some pics of those. Along with Bismarck the Turtle (sorry to those who don't get it). And of course the awesome fountain on your way out of the zoo.

 Lemurs and Hibiscus... yeah those go together. One ungodly cute, and the other utterly gorgeous.

 And then of course because certain members of my family are well... SPECIAL. Here ya go, proof of it. Josh in the pic on the right and then my father in the robin's nest. Just gonna put it out there that when he go in the robin's nest he decided to pretend to be one. Then wouldn't let any little kids get in it, kept them all waiting for like five minutes while he pretended to be a robin.

    

     So yeah, that was our family outing.... went rather well if I do say so myself. Heck the entire day was a good day, I don't think I've had one of those is a long time. Also just random thought, what would you all think if I worked at a funeral home? Ponder that for a bit. Yeah, I see that going well... tis why I'm applying to work at one. ^^

Quiz Number... holy crap! It's a flying moose! o.o

I know, I know... I said I'd stop doing these when my insomnia decides to kick my arse. But meh, this is better than me rambling on like a maniac like I normally do. Idk, then again you may actually like that. Lol 

Name: Rachael

Birthday: 9 July

Birthplace: Toledo, Ohio.

Current Location: Toledo, Ohio.

Hair Color: Red/ Copper (think old copper penny)   
Eye Color: Dark Brown  < ---- weird for a ginger, I know

Height: 5'5” <---- I'm a Shortass. Lol. xD
Right Handed or Left Handed: Ambidextrous, though predominantly Right Handed.
Your Heritage: Irish, Polish, Russian, German
The Shoes You Wore Today: Sandals

Your Weakness: I have many

Your Fears: Rejection, Drowning, Failure, Loneliness

Your Perfect Pizza: Extra Cheese, Pepperoni, Black Olives, Mushrooms, Banana Peppers and Bacon

Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To save enough money to travel somewhere next summer, like an overseas trip kinda thing.

Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: “Eh?”

Thoughts First Waking Up: "Ugh.."

Your Best Physical Feature: My hair, I guess

Your Bedtime: Wait there’s a such thing as “Bedtime”?!?!?! I wish I’d known that.

Your Most Missed Memory: Spending the weekend at my grandfather’s house or going fishing with him.

Pepsi or Coke: Pepsi

MacDonalds or Burger King: Ummm… KFC? I have a feeling you're sitting there "KFC?!?! That wasn't an option!" But do I look like I care? Exactly! xD

Single or Group Dates: Both

Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton

Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla

Cappuccino or Coffee: Both

Do you Smoke: Not often

Do you Swear: Profusely

Do you Sing: Doesn’t sound good, but yes I sing

Do you Shower Daily: Of Course

Have you Been in Love: Yep

Do you want to go to University:…. Ummm, I go to University….

Do you want to get Married: Someday, like when I’m 25 or 26, anything before that is too young in my opinion.

Do you believe in yourself: Not as much as I should

Do you get Motion Sickness: No (unless my mother is driving the vehicle, she’s a horrid driver, lol)

Do you think you are Attractive: I have slowly been persuaded by 2 or 3 people that I am in fact attractive, kinda doubted it there for awhile.

Are you a Health Freak: Nope

Do you get along with your Parents: Most of the time

Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes!

Do you play an Instrument: Violin (11 yrs and counting), Piano (not very good), Guitar (just starting out)

In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yes

In the past month have you Smoked: Yes

In the past month have you been on Drugs: No

In the past month have you gone on a Date: No

In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yes

In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Umm... yesh

In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yes

In the past month have you been on Stage: No

In the past month have you been Dumped: No

In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Umm, if the hot tub counts then yes, otherwise no.

In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No

Ever been Drunk:Yep

Ever been called a Tease: Yes

Ever been Beaten up: No

Ever Shoplifted: No

How do you want to Die: In my sleep…

What do you want to be when you Grow Up: Massage Therapist

What country would you most like to Visit: You want me to pick just one? >.< …. Can I count the UK as a whole? Pretty please, because I can’t choose.

In a Boy/Girl..

Favourite Eye Color: Brown or Green

Favourite Hair Color: Brown or Dark Blonde

Short or Long Hair: Doesn’t matter

Height: Taller than me preferably < ---- not that is takes much, I’m a shortass remember? xD

Weight: Doesn’t matter

Best Clothing Style: Umm…Grunge…. (or pretty much anything as long as it’s not “Whigger-ish”)

Number of Drugs I have taken: Umm... 1... 

Number of CDs I own: Physical CDs = 180- ish  … Albums/ CDs on the computer over 2000 so roughly 7500 actual songs  < ---- Music Fanatic xD

Number of Piercings: 7

Number of Tattoos: None… yet

Number of things in my Past I Regret: Meh, not much

Addiction...

      I can safely assume that no one really reads this, so I'm gonna let off some steam and rant. Not that I blame ya for not reading it, it's not terribly interesting; though you have to admit that I talk quite a bit here and I guess that sorta makes up for my epic silence outside of the blog. <--- Not at all.   I know I'm too quiet, I get that... but do I even attempt to fix that? Not really.  >.< Seriously something I need to work on because it truly pisses off people. I hate pissing people off, I really do... especially when it's someone I really care about. *sigh* Really have to work on that. 

     Next thing I'm gonna go on about that I really need to get off my chest. Remember in a previous blog when I mentioned we'd talk about addiction in another discussion (refer to the blog from 7 May, 2011 if you’ve no idea what I’m talking about) Yeah, this would be that discussion, no time like the present. And before you get the wrong idea, no I don't have an addiction (not a major one). Sadly though due to recent events we've slowly come to realise that my mother is addicted to painkillers. I think deep down we all knew it, but when she started passing out on the steps, at the table or other random places and would forget the date, where she was, or who she was talking to... we were completely sure. I know I shouldn't post it here, but atm it's the only place I can; the people I would normally talk to have kinda gone poof. v.v

     I don't know how to react to this, I mean I love my mother. Don't get me wrong I love her with all my heart, but how does one go about reacting to a parent having an addiction? I mean I could deny she has a problem, but what good would that be? Umm, it wouldn't do any good, I know that; but it also doesn't help that no other family members seem to believe she has a problem (even those who have seen it first hand ffs). Hell, she can't/ won't admit she has a problem either, which is of course not unheard of with addicts. But if she can't admit she has a problem how is anyone supposed to help? *head-desk* I wish someone would just f*ckin' tell me what I need to do to fix this. 

     However, this whole thing has made me decide to not take pain killers, unless absolutely necessary. I don't want to end up doing what my mother has done. Starting out on low dose / low strength painkillers and moving up the totem pole as it were. Like I said, I love my mother, I respect her and look up to her; she's a strong woman, but this makes it difficult to see that strength... it's almost like she's completely given up. I want my old mum back, the one who could go all day in the garden and still have the energy to go fishing after; the one who no matter what you did cared to listen to what happened. I don't want the mum that goes off on people when she hasn't been able to basically drug herself into a stupor because she had to work. 

     Am I wrong for wanting that? I feel like such a horrible daughter for wanting that and not being able to help her. I feel utterly useless when it comes to this. I should be able to f*cking help her and I can't. >.<  I don't want to lose her forever, but if she keeps it up that's what's going to happen. If she doesn't end up killing herself with the drugs, she'll end up losing the people she loves most. Again I feel like a horrid daughter for even thinking that way. Hell, I feel horrid for having to unload on all of you, and well for posting this. I probably shouldn't have, but I needed to vent somewhere... and this was the most logical place. 

     But now you know part of why I disappeared there for a bit. It was too much stress for me to deal with and just felt like an utter failure for not being able to help my own mother. And I can't say that this has really made me feel any better, but it did help some to make it hurt less I suppose. But I think that is enough of me going off on all of you with my problems, so I shall end it here. <---- Kinda regret posting this already.

     Thanks lovelies for just listening and being there. Xxxxx

    

Evoking Visions of My Favourite Casserole.... eheheh ^-^; ..wtf?

     I can't say I have much to talk about because that would be lying and well I'm not gonna do that. Much to my dismay, I haven't been up to much of anything lately. I'd rather be busy than stuck doing nothing. Meh, I'll get over it I suppose. But spawned from my boredom is this terrible video/ song, those of you who know the movie "The Silence of the Lambs" will more than likely appreciate this.

    

     Terrible I know, but also rather amusing, right? Or is that just me? Yeah, probably just me then, lol. This is why I shouldn't be allowed to have internet sometimes. But then again I'd probably go nuts without it. Also must share due to my lovely obsession with Peeps.

 

 Peeps Sushi!!! xD 

     Yesh, I know random, but epic you must admit. 

       Oh, so I went swimming again.... found out I'm no good at attempting to surf board. But then again I was in a pool and not in any actual waves, so that there in lies my problem I suppose. Go ahead and make fun of me, you know you want to. Though we all can admit that it's nowhere near as funny as my falling in the river or the catfish incident. ^-^;

     Random side note then I'm gonna go poof. 3 Doors Down is coming to Toledo!!!!!! Guess who's going to said concert?!?! *points to self* Yep, this girl. ^.^ So excited!! And now I'm gonna go. 

      

Luvvles you all. Toodles. Xxxxxx

Insomnia or not.... I've got to stop doing random quiz thingies...

1. Who do you talk to the most about your problems? My two best friends, they know who they are.

2. Are you going to get hurt anytime soon by someone? I hope not

3. Are you easy to get along with? I’d say so

4. What made you sad today? Surprisingly nothing for once

5. Who are you currently texting? No one

6. Are you a type of person who cares what people say about you? Not really

7. Has the last person you texted ever been super mad at you before? I don’t think so…

8. Is there someone who meant a lot to you at one point, and isn't around now? Mhmm

9. Do you think that you will ever live a happy life with somebody someday? One day

10. Are you single? Yeppers

11. Ever done anything illegal in a vehicle? Uh, yeah

12. How often do you hold back from saying what you are thinking? Depends on who I am talking to, but I tend to have no understanding of the “5 Second Rule”

13. Will you be in a relationship next Monday? More than likely not

14. If someone told you that you were a whore, what would you say back? I’d probably just shrug and not say anything.

15. How old will you be in 5 years? 25

16. Where would you like to live in the future? Do you really want a list.. bc that’d be a pretty long list.

17. Is any part of your body sore? Shoulder, due to a very nasty bruise I received going to battle with the clothes lines. >.<

18. Would you be able to date someone who doesn't make you laugh? Nope

19. Do you have reason to smile right now? Yes and no

20. What are you listening to right now? Winter- Josh Radin

21. Are your parents strict? They were, but they’ve gotten better

22. Is your hair curly? Yeppers ^^

23. Favorite color? Green

24. Do you have good vision? Mhmm

25. What are you wearing? “PJs”

26. Do you hate the last guy/girl you were talking to? No

27. Last movie you watched? The Shawshank Redemption

28. Last night, you felt...? Exhausted and like my mind was racing a mile a minute

29. How tall are you? 5’5” < --- is a shortass… I know

30. Do you think you have made a difference in anyone's life? I’d like to think so

31. Did you speak to your father today? Kinda sorta-ish… we’ve not really been on speaking terms lately

32. What do you usually do right when you wake up? Other than hit the snooze button…lol. I usually hop in the shower.

33. What are you thinking about right now? Too much to even type out, let’s go with one simple thing… that this song currently playing is friggin’ amazing.

34. Do you wish someone was with you right now? Mhmm, especially if that particular person is gonna just hug/ cuddle with me

35. What time did you go to sleep last night? I think it was around 3:30, I’m a chronic insomniac, so that’s very typical of me.

36. Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?No clue, but I may have to start calling it that when there are little kids around to f*ck with their heads. < --- ish a terrible person

37. What is the stupidest question you have been asked? “What is the name of the hair dye you use?”

38. How long have you had your current cell phone? 2 yrs

39. Do you think this coming year will top this past year? Hope so

40. If you were 12 and you could see yourself now, would you be disappointed? Maybe a little bit

41. Would you rather pierce your tongue or lip? … tongue? or better yet, neither … O. e

42. What were you doing at 8:00 this morning? Waking up

43. Do you wear eyeliner? Not usually

44. Told your parents you were going somewhere but went somewhere else? Many times

45. Do you like to sleep? Yes, I like to sleep, but apparently my mind / body does not.

46. Does someone like you right now? I've been asking myself the very same question for quite some time now, and still have no "right" answer for it. Yay for being lost and confused. v.v 

47. Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your bed? My bedroom floor

48. Is your room ever clean? Usually spotlessly clean…. Yay for OCD. xD

49. Do you drink bottled water? Only if it’s the only thing around, tap water is just as good.

50. Honestly, are things going the way you planned? Not at all

51. Is the last person of the opposite sex you texted single? Nope

52. Is your birthday soon? No, it just recently passed.

53. Would your parents get mad if you got drunk while they were present? No

54. When's the last time you said you were fine, but really weren't? That’s like every other day for me. >.<

55. Last person you gave your number to, guy or girl? The last time I personally gave my number out it was to a guy… and that was quite some time ago.

56. When was the last time you were on the phone after 2 AM? It’s been awhile

57. Has anyone said they love you in the last week? Yep

58. Do you need to say anything to anyone? Ummm,yes… I do…but I can’t bring myself to do it.<---- Too much of a pansy to do it is more like it. ._.

59. Is there someone on your mind that shouldn't be? Mhmm

60. Do you ignore people when you're mad/upset with them? I try not to do this, it’s something I use to do a lot and got me nowhere.

61. What song are you currently listening to? Kidz- Take That

62. Do you talk about your feelings or hide them? I generally where my emotion on my sleeve.

63. Last time you went on a walk with someone? Earlier today with my younger brother. ^^

64. Have you ever gotten burnt by a cigarette? Yeah

65. Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone? Yeah, I do. But haven’t gotten any in quite some time, and that really kinda bothers me tbh.