I shall return...

Ok, so random update thing. But not really. I'm just putting this out there that I'm away for this weekend. So anything posted on my blog after say... emm, after this post... is actually a queued. Sorry, I'm lame like that. But I don't want to leave you all with absolutely nothing. But that being said, I'm going to Columbus/ Hilliard for the weekend. Those of you who know me well enough, know that when I'm gone for this sort of weekend, I rarely get online, check email, blog, IMVU... hell I barely even text while I'm gone.... pretty sure you can gather why.

But yeah, Cannibal Corpse/ In Flames/ Slyosis/ Lamb of God concert/ date this weekend. That'll be fun. I'll come back Monday exhausted from headbanging and moshing. Yep, I bet not one of my readers can imagine me doing either of those. Well, guess what? I do. As small as I may be, I love it. Granted last time Jon and I went on concert date I practically got squished in the mosh pit, at least I had him there to "save" me. xD

And with that, I shall leave you all with my lovely queued posts for this weekend. Hopefully I can get some pictures Sunday night to be able to post here. ^-^

Love you all. xxxx

Oh... oh.... anyone looking for a good blog to follow... should take a look at these. They're pretty awesome.

expresslyforbidden.blogspot.com 

updatesonjess.blogspot.com

Yet another survey... yay! o.o

1. What were you doing half an hour ago?

- Waking up, making coffee, getting as many chores done as possible.

2. Do your grandparents have mobile phones?

- Yeah, they both do.

3. What about Facebook - do your grandparents use Facebook?

- Yesh, one is great at it... the other, not so much

4. What do you have planned for tomorrow evening?

- Running away with Jonathan for the weekend. xD

5. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Has that person ever been to your house?

- Jonathan. And yesh, he has many, many times.

6. What do you mostly use your phone for - calls, texts, or Internet?

- Texting.

7. Do you have any text messages from your ex, or have you deleted them all?

- *looks at phone* ... emm.. deleted them all finally back in September, when I'd completley moved on and started seeing someone else.

8. How much alcohol do you have in your house?

- There's a good deal of it in the bar.... o.o

9. Did you receive a text message today that made you smile? Who was it from and what did it say?

- Yep, 2... a g'morning have a good day one from Jonathan...and my usual wake up text from my sissy ^-^

10. Do you know what the person you love/like is doing tonight?

- Working v.v

11. Were you single over the last summer?

-For most of it, yeah.

12. Think back 2 months ago; were you in a relationship?

-Kinda sorta... we were just starting out on that path.

13. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?

-I can think of at least 3-4 people. One for sure.

14.Don’t tell me lies, is the last person you texted attractive?

-She's utterly gorgeous, inside and out. ^-^

15. Tell me 3 facts about the first person you had a relationship with.

He was born in March.
He played guitar.
He was called James.

16. Tell me 3 facts about the last person you had a relationship with/the person you’re with now.

He plays bass.
He loves metal.
His name is Jonathan.


17. Can you remember the last time you wanted to do something, but you couldn’t? What was the reason?

- Umm, 2 wks ago. Movies with Jess.... car failures, and then money issues.

18. Does your computer crash a lot?

- Nope, internet does now and then.

19. The last time you said “thank you” to someone, what was it for? And does it bother you if you do something for someone, and they don’t say thank you?

- It was either Jonathan or Martika. They both listened to a good deal of venting the other night. And it doesn't bother me, tbh, I usual don't notice anymore.

21. What colour are the walls of the room you’re in?

- Sagey green

22. Does it bother you when people talk constantly about themselves and don’t even bother to ask how you are?

- Not always, depends on my mood and what they are saying about themselves I guess.

23. Is there a type of job you’d NEVER want to do? Why?

- I dunno.

24. What brand of shampoo do you currently use?

- Umm... whatever I grab off the shelf at the store... I really don't look anymore.

25. Think about your last ex. Do you still find him/her attractive?

- Meh, a lil bit

26. Do you regret kissing the last person you kissed?

- No.

27. Have you ever wanted to be a teacher?

- At one point, yeah I did.

28. If someone were to ask you out right now, would you say yes?

- Emm, seeing as I'm with someone, no I would not say yes.

29. If someone looked at you right now and said that you were attractive, would you agree?

- I never really see myself as attractive. So, probably wouldn't agree.

30. Name one thing you’ve eaten today that contained sugar.

- Coffee! It's all I'll have to "eat" until supper tonight. xD

31. If the last person you kissed told you that you were the only one they wanted, would you believe them?

- I haven't romantically kissed anyone is ages. But seeing as I make sure to kiss my mum g'night/ g'morning every day... yeah, I'd believe her.

32. What was the last thing you took medication for?

- Migraine

33. Do you think the last person you texted is sexually active? (You don’t have to say who the person is if you don’t want to, just say yes or no.)

- Yep, kinda obvious when she has a lil one. xD

34. The last person you kissed, tells you that he/she has kissed someone else. What do you do/say?

- I kissed my mum g'morning... o.o I don't care who else she kisses xD

35. Can you remember who you had feelings for 24 months ago? Do you still speak to that person?

- Yes, and oddly enough, yes...

36. Did the last person you kissed have any of these letters in their name: S, J, D?

- Nope

37. At what age do you think someone should be considered a young adult, instead of a child? Why?

- I dunno, young adult is like 16 I guess, even though that’s more teen and I feel like 18 is young adult. Because at 18 you are an adult but still young, hence young adult, so yeah, 18.

38. The last dream you had, was it an interesting one? What was it about? What exactly happened?

- Yeah, it was interesting. I'm keeping it to myself. ^-^;

39. If someone offered you sex right now, how would you respond?

- Depends who it was, either uhhh no thanks, or yeah sure.

40. Can you remember the last time you cried in someone’s arms?

- Last Friday... his awesome hugs made it better tho

41. Who was the last person to send you a message on Facebook? Do you think that person cares for you?

- My brother, and yesh, yesh he does.

42. Do you think the last person you hugged is a virgin?(Again, you don’t have to say who it is, just say yes or no.)

- Heh, no... my mum is not. Otherwise I would not be here

43. Do you think you’ve found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?

- There's a very real possibility.

44. What is a nickname that people use for you a lot? Do you like this nickname, or does it annoy you?

- Rach, Rachy, Spaz, Duckie, Dovey, Artie ... I love them all.

45. What if someone told you that at some point in the future, you will get married to the last person you texted?

- That would be wrong as I’m straight and it was my sissy.

46. Is there something you want to talk about, or something you want to discuss with a certain person, but you feel as though you can’t? Why do you feel like you can’t have that conversation?

- I want to talk to Kas. I just want to be friends again, that’s all. I want to talk to my brother, and find out why he did what he did. And I want to talk to Jonathan, simply for the fact of wanting to.

47. Has anyone you know ever been on the TV or radio?

- Me! And several other people, and just about anyone who went to TSA. xD

48. Do you ever think about people from your past, and wonder how they turned out, or what they might be doing now?

- Ayup...

49. Have you ever started off being friends with someone, and then you ended up disliking them, or hating them, for any reason?

- Once or twice.

50. Be honest, what do you want more than anything at this moment in time?

- For it to be Friday night, to get my license, and to have my brothers back.

Bitchy, ranty...and probably rather offensive

I don't know what brought this on. Oh, wait... yesh I do... but that's neither here nor there. Give you a hint, it's gonna be ranty, it's gonna be bitchy and there's going to be cursing... end of story. Don't like it? See that "X" in the corner *points*  go ahead and click it.

*****Disclaimer---- If you feel any of this is geared toward you... perhaps it is, perhaps it isn't. That's on you. There is a reason I used no names, and it shall remain as such. *****


I'm done being an option to people, when I make them a priority in my life. I don't like being greeted by utter silence when I need someone there the most. And then have people complain to me about it when I'm not there for them every bloody time they need someone to simply shove all their problems onto. I am not a fucking tack board that you can just stick your problems to. I'd be more obsequious about it all, if you were there for me when I need you or simply anyone to be there for me; instead of shoving me off as unimportant until you have some use for me. That's a great way to make someone feel real good about themselves. Wait... no. Actually it's a really good way to make someone feel worthless... and an even better way to lose a friend.

Secondly, if you have an issue with the way I live my life, who I associate myself with or who I date. Guess what? I really don't care, keep it to yourself... or if it really bothers you that much, tell me it bothers you and then promptly walk the fuck out of my life and save yourself the aggravation that I am so fervently causing you by living my life. If who I date bothers you (when in reality, it shouldn't; again my life, my choice), if it creeps you out that much, doesn't suit your morals, or simply makes you jealous or what have you... guess what, you may take your leave of me as well. I'm not going to change who I am, or who I want to be with to please you. Because it doesn't matter if what I does pleases you, it's none of your damn business. Give you a hint, it's my life... I'll do as I please, and see whomever it is that makes me happy. I don't judge you, the way you live, or the people you see.... don't bloody do it to me.

On the note of who I date/ see, not that it's really anyone's business. But since it seems to bug people so much, I'll share it here. Yes, I am dating Jonathan. Yes, he is 10 yrs older than me. Yes, we've known each other ages. No, it is NOT creepy in any way, shape, or form. But that is my opinion and the opinion shared by the people who matter most to me, the people who TRULY care if I'm happy or not. Again you don't like the way I live my life, there's the exit *points again* ... you don't have to stay and I'm not gonna try and make you. That being said, off the subject of my love life, it's mine... you don't really need to know about it. 

Moving on from that, the people who refuse to help themselves when they are more than capable of doing so. You are not as helpless as you make yourself out to be. You look for pity, but you have all the means you need to fix the predicament you're in. That being said, you simply choose not to, and continue to be depressed, bitchy, and you have this false sense of entitlement. That everything should just be handed to you, because "you deserve it". Give you a hint, if you aren't going to try to fix your problems, you deserve only what you strive for; you don't deserve handouts. Simple as that. 

Something I will never understand is how someone can spend literally every waking second flirting with anything that moves. I swear, if a table lamp had legs, you'd find a way to charm it into your bed. Wanna know what's even worse? When you do it and you shove it in other people's faces, even when you do it "unknowingly".... it's bad-mannered and uncouth. From what I can discern, you don't want to know about mine, so why put you're sexual exploitations out in the air? That's right, you have to brazenly flaunt your conquests as it were to feel more "manly". Tantalizingly attractive isn't it? Heh, no far from it. It's actually quite cad-ish and abhorrent in taste. Nothing like the casual man whore.

You've already heard my rant on the whole becoming an actual adult bit, not going there again. Not worth my time. But then again, on the subject of being an adult. Turning eighteen does not constitute adulthood.It is just the age that this society and many others deem "adulthood" simply to have kids get out of their parent's houses and out on their own. Ok, it works great if the kid is ready, but most of the time said child is not ready. Nor is that child ready to get married at the age of eighteen to a person younger than them. This goes back to the blog from a few weeks ago and few recent events. Translation, my younger brother turned eighteen, decided he was a man and wanted to marry his girlfriend of about 2 months.... left in the middle of the night on Thanksgiving (Way to be a douche-bag btw!), never said a word about it to anyone, just up and left leaving behind only a few excuse ridden notes. Yeah! Adulthood! T-T 

Lastly, that one person who has nothing to do with your life anymore, but insists on butting in their damn nose. This is directed to one particular person, who I know still reads this blog. Just stop harassing me and the people I care about. It's terrible when you literally have no clue and you have this deluded sense of  "I'm still your best  friend" .... give you a hint, when I stopped talking to you almost 3 years ago... that made our friendship null and void. Simple as that. So please, just bugger off and live your own life and stop telling me how to live mine. 

So that was really ranty, and well it felt good to do it. But, now that I've offended probably half my followers with my language and/ or what I've said.... I'm gonna go. Actually take that back, I want to wish my nephew Tommy a happy 6 months! You're growing up too quick lil bugger. xD  

Now I'm gonna go. 

Trying to lighten the mood.... at least for now

1. Is there someone you would like to be with at this moment? Why aren’t you with them?

- Umm yeah. Because he live 300+ miles away in Hilliard. Get to spend the weekend with him tho, so not all bad.

2. If you were going to make a sandwich now, what would you put on it?

- Emm... bacon.... yesh bacon would suffice right about now.

3. What’s your relationship with the last person you talked to on the phone?

- Talked to on the phone? I'm dating him. Texted? She's my sister

4. Is there a friend you haven’t seen or spoken to in a while? Why haven’t you seen or spoken to them?

- Yeah, I guess so. I don't really think he wants much to do with me anymore. Not that I can say I blame him.

5. Do you ignore people when you’re annoyed or upset?

- Pffft, yeah I do. It's not very nice of me, but it's better than going off on them.

6. Is there anything worrying you atm? Would you like to talk about it?

- My brother. And not on here, no I would not like to talk about it

7. Is there anyone that you know definitely doesn’t like you? Does that bother you?

- I don't know. There's a good possibilty of it. And at this point, no I no longer care.

8. Can you remember the last time you felt angry or upset? What was the reason?

- Last Friday, younger brother ran off to live with his gf/ fiancee....

9. Who were the last three people you talked to before going to bed last night?

- Jonathan, Martika, and Jess

10. Are you wearing nail varnish? Is it chipped?

- Nope, and no

11. Tell me about the last conversation you had with a friend of the same sex. Who did you talk to, and what did you talk about?

- It was with Martika, talking about our plans for the day.

12. Now tell me about the last conversation you had with a friend of the opposite sex.

- Something about arm twisting and reciprocation. xD

13. You’re trying to end a conversation, but the other person doesn’t seem to want to stop talking. What do you do?

- Usually just sit quietly and wait, or if I genuinely need to leave I’d just be like sorry but I have to go.

14. Have you ever told anyone that you wished you’d never met them? Did you mean it?

- No. There's a few I'd love to say it to, but I'm not that mean.

15. Who is the most intelligent person you know?

- I know many itelligent people, I'm not just going to pick one.

16. Would you say your name is a ‘common’ name? Do you know lots of other people with your name?

- Yeah, my name is pretty common, though my spelling is the less common version. xD

17. Have you ever really liked a song to begin with, but then you listened to it so much that you got bored of it?

- Yeah, I do that often.

18. If a boyfriend/girlfriend was clingy, would that be a problem for you?

- No, to be honest I think I’m so used to feeling like the clingy one it’d be a nice change and at least you know they cared.

19. If you saw your last ex holding hands with someone else, would it bother you?

- Emmm. Idk, maybe a lil, though probably not in the end.

20. Who was the last person you talked to, whose name started with a letter M? Do you know what colour that person’s eyes are?

- Martika, and if I remember they are a hazel/ green colour.

21. You have a lot on your mind and really need to talk. Who would you go to?

- Jonathan, Martika, or Jess.

22. Which day did you prefer, yesterday, or today? Why?

- Today, brings me one step closer to this weekend.

23. Who is the person that has hurt you the most? How has that person affected you?

- Hurt me the most this year? Pretty sure I don't need to point out who it is, I think they know.

24. Have you talked in your sleep before?

- I do now and then, but I apparently giggle in my sleep. o.o

25. Is there a letter that occurs in your name more than once?

- E.

26. If you could design your perfect partner, what would he/she look like? And what kind of personality would he/she have?

- I'm gonna be a loser and simply pout I don't care what he looks like, just so long as he loves me for me.

27. Think about the first person you had a relationship with. Do you believe that person loved you?

- No, not love, just liked. We were way to young to truly know what love was. I think it was just 2 yrs of us liking each other.

28. Who is the first person who comes to mind that you dislike. Why? How often do you see/speak to that person?

- A girl I went to HS with... ah fuck it ... Mary Reilly. She turned into my worst nightmare. And I don't anymore, at all.

29. For numbers 1 to 5, list the names of the last 5 people that texted you. For numbers 6 to 10, list the names of the last 5 people you talked to online.

Martika
Jess
Tom
Jonathan
Barb
Kas
Loki
Rhia (Jess)
Luke
Sage (Martika)

30. Who is 8 going out with? What do you think of that person?

- Single as far as I know.

31. Does 5 live within walking distance?

- No. She lives in Florida.

32. What is 2’s ex called?

- I like to call him Douchebag.... but that's just me

33. What is 7’s favourite food?

- Not sure actually.

34. What is 6’s mother called?

- Sandra

35. How many boyfriends/girlfriends has 3 had?

- I have no idea

36. Is 9 attractive?

- Eh, sure. I suppose so.

37. What kind of music does 1 listen to?

- Anything under the sun

38. What colour is 10’s hair?

- Reddish-brown as far as I know

39. What is 4’s favourite colour?

- Black

40. Have you ever hugged 3?

- A few times

41. What if 1 told you he/she was going to be a mother/father?

- She has! Love my lil nephew.

42. Have you ever got drunk with 2?

- Drunk, no. Tipsy... on several occasions

43. Is 9 in a relationship?

- Yes, With Mizzy

44. What is your earliest memory of 8?

- Ms. Reamer's class in HS

45. What kind of men/women does 6 like?

- I don’t really know.

46. Who has kissed the most people, you or 5?

- I’m not really sure.

47. Briefly describe your relationship with 10.

- Friends from school. Sisters. Need I say more?

48. Does 4 have any pets?

- 2 cats.

49. How long have you known 7?

- A good few years, like 6.

50. To finish, say something about each person. :)

Martika - One of my two best female friends. Known her longer than everyone except one person (#4). She's my sissy, and I love her to death.
Jess - Lovely person, the second of my two best female friends. Love her to death, also see her as a sister. And we get into tons of trouble together. xD
Tom - Martika's hubby, good friend, funny and supportive.
Jonathan - Known him longer than anyone else. He's funny, smart, quirky, a complete nerd like myself. Hence why we get on so well. ^-^
Barb - Grandmother. Amazing woman. Love her with all my heart.
Kas - Well, we were best friends, dated for awhile. I care for him like any good friend would. But we've sorta drifted apart. >.<
Loki- One of my best online friends. He's always there for me when I need him. Fun to be around.
Rhia (Jess)- See above mentioned.
Luke- Just a good friend, a goof and smartass.
Sage (Martika) - Also see above mentioned.

Brave... and other random stuff

So, Brave came out today. Wanna take a guess what the first thing is I did? Ayup, went and picked up my copy of it. Love that I didn't have to wait in line for it, or fear that they'd run out of copies... thank you pre-sale request made in September. xD Have I mentioned how much I love this movie? I find it hilarious when people come up to me and say I look like Merida from it, which I guess is kinda true, I do.  That was adventurous enough for today.

Speaking of adventures, this past weekend was quite an adventure. Jonathan and I went to a Black Dahlia Murder/ All That Remains/ Machine Head/ Dethklok concert Friday night. Save for being ungodly small and getting severely thrown around in the mosh pit like a rag-doll and being doused in beer at one point, it was an awesome night. On top of that, it made for a very memorable and truly one of a kind first date. Looking forward to the Cannibal Corpse/ Lamb of God concert next month now. ^-^;

But, wait! More adventures ensue for this week as well. Jess and I are going out Thursday for a movie night, that promises to be fun. And Friday, it's girls night out with Jess and Keanu. I sense trouble already, but I can't wait. I miss my girls.

Hmm, trying to think if there's much else I can say right now. Not really been up to much lately. Just kinda a homebody, nothing to important I suppose. Oh, what a boring life I lead. xD 

50... oh, wait... no 47 random questions xD

1.Do you want a boyfriend or girlfriend? Sure.

2.When did your last hug take place? Emm, first thing Jonathan did when he came in the door xD

3.Are you a jealous person?  I can be, more so than I'd like to be

4.Are you tired right now? Extremely

5.Do you chew on your straws? Eh, sometimes

6.Have you ever been called a tease? A few times. xD

7.Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight? Do that a lot

8.Do you cry easily? Meh, not really

9.What should you be doing right now? Uh, packing so I can head out the door...

10.Are you a heavy sleeper? Kinda depends

11.Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months? I know I can xP

12.Are you mad at someone right now? Little bit, yeah

13.Do you believe in love? Ayup

14.What makes you laugh no matter what? .... being tickled.... o.o

15.Who was the last person you talked to? Jess

16.Do you get butterflies around the person you like? Yeah

17.Will you get married? One day

18.When was the last time you smiled? Idk, not that long ago...

19.Does anyone like you? Yep

20.Do you secretly like someone? Not really a secret anymore...

21.Who was the first person you talked to today? Martika

22.Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? Eh, Jess, Martika, and Jonathan I suppose

23.What are you NOT looking forward to? Eh... nothing that I can think of

24.What ARE you looking forward to? The Dethklok/ Black Dahlia Murder concert/date tonight xD

25.Has someone of the opposite sex ever told you they loved you, and meant it? Ayup

26.Suppose you see your ex kissing another person what would you do? I'd probably shrug, and say good for them, they deserve to find someone else better for them than I was xD

27.Do you plan on moving out within the next year? I have no idea atm

28.Are you a forgiving person? Yes, sometimes way too forgiving for my own good

29.How many TRUE friends do you have? Emm, 5...

30.Do you fall for people easily? Depends on the person, but yeah I tend to

31.Have you ever fallen for your ex’s best friend? Nope

32.What’s the last thing you put in your mouth? Ice Cube xD

33.Who was the last person you drove with? Jonathan

34.How late did you stay up last night and why? 3 am... was attempting to clean and failed at packing

35.If you could move somewhere else, would you? There are several places I loved to move to, but as of right now, I'm content where I am.

36.Who was the last person you took a picture of? My brother... I think

37.Can you live a day without TV? Do it all the time

38.When was the last time you were extremely disappointed? Hmm, extremely disappointed... 4-5 months ago I suppose o.o

39.Three names you go by? Rach(y), Dovey/ Duckie, Artie

40.Are you currently in a relationship? Not at the moment...

41.What is your all-time favorite romance movie? Moulin Rouge or The Notebook I guess xD

42.Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate? Meh, I'd like to think so, but it's a farfetched idea.

43.What’s your current problem? Money... it's always my problem. Lol

44.Have you ever had your heart broken? Several times.

45.Your thoughts of long distance relationships? Being as I've been in two failed ones (one online and one where someone moved away, so yesh I know both).... just gonna say.... don't do it... just don't. They feel great while you're in them, but the likelihood of them working out is so slim that at this point I feel  it's not worth going thru the pain and extreme effort of keeping one going. : /

46.How many kids do you want to have? 3-4 xD

47.Have you ever found it hard to tell someone you like them? Yep


Ooo... this bugs me... there's only 47. Why would it end on such a random number? It's weird, and my OCD doesn't like that off kilter number. xD

Things I hate:  (In no particular order)
1. Bad grammar
2. Presidential election years
3. Being lied to/ lead on/ used
4. Being called "Red" (you sign your own death warrant if you call me this)
5. Badgers....
6. People who go to a fast-food place, order the biggest meal and then a diet soda (Yeah, because that's gonna make that super-sized Big Mac meal so much healthier.... wait no >.< )
7. People who refuse to help themselves when they are fully capable of doing so
8. Justin Bieber (need I say more?)
9.  Drivers who apparently get their licenses out of Cracker Jacks boxes
10. People doing things completely out of spite.. hoping that it'll get to you and upset you. When in the end, they just look like an idiot.

And since I did ten things I hate... why not ten things I love to lighten the mood. xD

1. Books, oh god do I love books and reading ^-^
2. Cuddles xD
3. True friends, they mean so much and it's nice to have a few people who truly care for you
4. Confidence... what's not to like about that?
5. Death Metal... well, just metal in general, along with just about any type of music
6. Honesty, even if it's completey brutal honesty I still prefer that to being lied to
7. Energy Drinks/ Coffee/ Tea... I like caffeine ok? xP
8.Autumn weather
9. When a guy asks a girl's parents if he can take her on a date. It's a sign of respect to her and her parents, really just love that.
10. KFC... tis my downfall in life. xD