11 December, 2012

I don't even know

Not really a lot to write here. I mean I lead a pretty boring life, but I suppose it could be worse. I suppose I could start off by saying that I'm excited to hear that The Hobbit is due out this week, that Jess and I intend on going to see it.... but no plans have been made, because plans fails anytime she and I make them. Hmm, I would also like to add a little section here to say that my prayers and thoughts go out to the Lightfoot family and to the Hollis family. Both of which have lost people very important to them recently, and both of them will be sorely missed. 

Found out, no Jonathan this weekend, something about the duct-work at the house. So, Christmas shopping and baking it is. Joy.... I "love" shopping this time of year. Can you tell just how excited I am by that? I love Christmas, don't get me wrong. However, I cannot stand how stupid and self-centered people become around Christmas. It's not about getting/ giving gifts, it's about spending time with your friends and family. Simple as that. Christmas has become a commercialized holiday, as have most of the others. Can't change what society has ingrained in people's minds. 

I'm going to go off on a few tangents. Huh, who'd have thought? Rachael not going off on a tangent would be more of a surprise. xD 

1) I've made the horrid mistake to re-read the A Song of Ice and Fire series by George R.R. Martin. Don't get me wrong I adore this series. But it's been ages since I read it and I forgot how long it is. Let me put it this way Game of Thrones is about 700 pages on it's own... the entire series at least the books that are publish add up to about 4228 pages. Yeah, that's going to be oh so much fun to re-read. 

2) I have low self-esteem already, thanks to experiences with a great many people. I've never seen myself as pretty, gorgeous, or attractive. I don't tend to believe people when they say I am, because I feel I'm not. I know I'm not thin, I never have been and to be honest, I probably never will be. I eat pretty healthy and try my best to stay away from soda/ energy drinks now, not gonna lie I do still enjoy them now and then. I don't eat out at fast food places, and I generally don't eat junk food. But lately I've had a constant reminder that I'm apparently not pretty enough or thin enough for any guy to ever take interest in me. That's what a girl needs right? Being told she isn't good enough, especially by someone who knows nothing of my life. I should just brush it off and ignore it, but it plays in in the back of my head, and sometimes I wonder if what this person say is true.

3) I don't know how many of my readers suffer from chronic migraines. But those who do, understand how truly debilitating they can be. There are days, where just because it's cloudy or rainy, you can't get up out of bed. Other days you're fine. Sometimes your head hurts so bad, it makes you nauseated and dehydrated, usually resulting in a hospital visit, IVs and pain killers... and consequently, sometimes over night stays at said hospital. It sucks that you go to a neurologist to see what's causing them.. and then have no answer. NONE at all. "Oh, it just runs in your family history. You'll grow out of them. Here's some drugs to help." Basically, "You're stuck like this... deal with it." .... Great T-T 

4) I've run out of things to talk about. I had a general idea of what I wanted to talk about and now I'm just out of ideas. I could sit here and ramble, but  that's not very interesting for any of you. So I think for now I'm done here. Before I go, I shall leave you with this...